When Manuel and Maria Rojas conceive, they ask Wanda to work with them. Wanda's body tingles the promise of growth with a rush. Her skin stretches miles in all directions. A resounding, "Yeeessss," thrums out from her heart.
Months later, as Maria's pregnancy matures well and the due date close at hand, her regular contractions causes fear to rip through her. Tension peals from her shoulders, oozing dread and coats her face. Her eyes widen and her breath, is unsteady. The intense surges are foreign to her. She has no reference to understand or trust the experience. Begging Wanda for reassurance that it will be okay as the next wave rises to greet her.
Wanda searches the dusty caverns of brain storage for the high school spanish and says, “Con calma. Breathe mas larga.” Wanda’s Spanish is barely tolerable. The time she spent in Mexico seems to make it worse. She becomes more brazen; unabashed by her inability to conjugate the correct subject or tense.
"Language is not important," Wanda reassures herself. Faith in this woman — her Lady — to birth as generations before her, bridges all communication hiccups. As Wanda works with her Lady, the baby calls out and asks Wanda to keep her mother strong. The infant is suspended inside the darkness, awaiting her first breath. She glows a rosy pink inside Wanda’s mind. Wanda feels the child’s resolve to enter the world.
The dynamic relationship between the couple continues to unfold. Wanda observes the moment. Maria blames her husband for doing this to her, for causing her pain and changing her life. She came to America to be independent. Immigrating only a year ago, she conceived soon after. The life of a self-sufficient woman slides into obscurity. She repeats the legacy of the generations before her, even though she moved thousands of miles to escape it. With her definition of freedom fading, Maria knows no other way to define the role of motherhood than by her cultural upbringing. This path must be carved from the land itself.
“She was gonna get pregnant sooner or later!” declares Manuel, trained by the men in is his world to regard his mother and sisters as instruments of procreation. It is their lot, he believes. This does not prepare him for the unveiling of her anger as her eyes gnaw through him. Her desperation shoots out and cleaves his soul.
Wanda is unable to understand the words but the anguish turns her mouth into a pit of worms, and boils the bile in her gut. Supporting them in their transition into a family, Wanda allows Maria to demand that Manuel succumb to the power of the feminine. Wanda trusts in the universal passion that brings the couple together. She acknowledges her guides as they celebrate the transition and whisper, "What a wonderful lesson this will be for them."
Wanda anticipates the gift, holding her thoughts still. She loves every minute of its unwrapping. Each gorgeous layer perfectly reflects the energy of the moment. Emotions are raw and real. She savors the delicious energy that exists when Source has no resistance.
Wanda is a doula, a wise woman, a mother. No other representation in creation comprises the individual she is. It is her honor to serve this young couple. In respect to the One, she has given herself permission to be uniquely herself.
Defined by the world, Wanda is a white, privileged American woman. Descending from a northern European heritage that range from Germany to Hungary, her gypsy blood keeps her free and unbound by conventional ethics. When cornered, she is like a wild boar defending her territory. No other will hold sovereignty over her. Her power is her own knit into the fiber of Gaia.
Maria has the sweet innocence of youth. Her soulful eyes hold the strength of a culture deeply rooted in the earth. Her hair, braided into a thick, dark rope, flows down her strong back. She’s yet to uncover the wisdom hidden inside her. The hospital staff classifies her as an undocumented Mexican immigrant on Medicaid.
The two of them are a dynamic couple. Their unifying force is the call of the infant. A palatable filament of strength cues both mother and doula. Listening from the heart creates a flow in the life force. They are vibration in nature. The vast space between the particles that make the body amplifes signals, translating them into action.
The elderly room attendant is uncomfortable with Maria’s deep, guttural moans and feels a rescue is in order. “An epidural would make it all better. Why don’t you have one?” she proffers.
Pain teaches an element of strength. With faith, the perception of pain transforms into energy. Birth gives women a new understanding of the river that is life itself. Children already understand this cascade. Women are reintroduced as mothers. Since the room attendant is adding to Maria’s insecurity, Wanda steps in. “Stop offering. Maria will ask for it when she needs it!”
Alas, Wanda is too late. The discouragement latches into Maria's resolve. The other staff members chime in. The labor and delivery nurse takes control of the situation.
“You must have an epidural to stop the pain.” Speaking in Spanish, the nurse describes the blissful effect of the medication.
After the propaganda is complete, Wanda speaks. “Tell her the effect the drug has on her baby postpartum.” They say there is none, which is not true.
“Who are you?” the obstetrician asks coming into the room as the nurse began tripping over herself, defending the drug use.
Wanda’s presence irritates the hospital staff. “Just a friend,” Wanda replies.
The obstetrician is an angry, punctured creature. Wanda threatens her authority with the magnitude of the earth beneath her feet. Pulling Wanda into the hallway to belittle her, a self-righteous fuel boils the blood behind her eyes. Wanda disregards her jurisdiction. and realizes, at this moment, why she is needed here. She roots deeper into the heart of Gaia and demands an interpreter, on Maria’s behalf, to explain the danger of the epidural, regardless of their claim that there are no side effects. They scramble to get her the interpreter that can explain what is her right understand.
The staff swishes about finding the anesthetist and the interpreter. Wanda turns on her heal to return to the room. A musty, wet fur odor wafts into her nose. "Dog?" Wanda questions, "who would let a dog into labor and delivery?" Then she sees them. The wolf pack. All light shifts at the end of the hall, a mist separates them from the glaring fluorescent glow of the hospital fixture.
Wanda fills with their presence. Wanda questions whether to approach. Cautiously, she assesses their stance using her heart to see. The vision through Love circumvents the mind's program of fear. No doubts. She's been visited by single animals delivering messages but never a pack. Not even a single wolf comes to mind. It must have something to do with Maria and her totem animals.
Wanda recalls something she read in one of the Mexican folklore books the kids took home from the library for a project. If her memory, serves her the spirit of wolves represents freedom and independence. Symbolizing family unity and teamwork.
The pack guards the door of the birth room. Wanda asks permission to enter by bowing her head and averting her eyes to her shoes. She hears the gruff voice from the golden-eyed leader, standing in the center, "We are here for the young cub yet to emerge. Bring her safely into the world without interference. We give you time to do this. Use your wisdom to direct the safe entry of this One into the world."
The impression of the voice strengthens Wanda's protective instinct. She bows and slides across the threshold. A burst of clarity funnels through her, giving her the techniques to assist the decent of the infant as she twists around the bones of her mother's body. The supine position does not support the infant. Wanda stuffs an extra sheet under Maria and stands on the bed. Holding each end above the pelvis, she hears the instruction, "Use only the right hand and pull up quickly. It will rotate the head into position." After three pulls, Wanda is winded and climbs down from the bed.
The mood changes as Maria's labor changes tempo. Demoralized, Manuel cannot deal with Maria’s distress as she begs him to make it stop. She pleads in Spanish to him, “Por favor, mi amor, no más.” Maria is now unhinged. The possibility of giving away the pain gives her permission to let it consume her until the relief comes.
She requires he understand the sacrifice she makes by bearing his child. He does not honor the transformation. He looks to Wanda for guidance. It is not for her to interfere but rather to guide him to stand by his partner. With the baby so close, this is the turning point in the labor.
Wanda smiles and stands behind him, whispering, “Remind her to breathe. For the baby, if not for herself. Inhale and exhale; that is all that is required.”
“But I can’t …”His eyes fill but the tears do not fall, revealing his weak, flaccid heart.
Wanda blames herself for not guiding them enough before the birth. She left the childbirth education classes to the hospital. Although they cover essentials, much of the spiritual aspects of birth are not exercised. Most parents leave with their head full of worries and their hearts aching for connection to the process. She must intervene and shift the energy.
“Necessita va al baño?” Wanda asks. (Do you need to go to the bathroom?)
“Qué?” (What?) He asks.
“It will help.” Wanda nods, taking authority as the wise woman. They assist Maria into the bathroom, Manuel stays with her. Closing the door, Wanda returns to the rocking chair and continues to channel Love from Source.
The labor and delivery nurse returns with a flourish and an entourage. “Where is she?”
Wanda is cloaked in the energy that resides between worlds. There she can perceive the emergence of the baby and all the pink radiant light surrounding her. With effort, she opens her heavy eyelids to answer. “In the bathroom,” Wanda answers.
The team barges into the bathroom with the urgency of a steam engine. Maria’s cocoon is disrupted. They pull her out, shouting about having the baby in the toilet. The aggression they display reflects the lack of trust the medical community has for the birthing process. Grabbing her under each arm, the small group drags the pregnant woman, letting her feet drag in the linoleum.
Her legs weak like wet noodles, they hoist her into the air and shove her onto the bed. The violation and disrespect continues. Wanda channels the Love from Source to embrace Maria and the baby. Soon, the baby’s head crowns. Now there is no time to administer an epidural. Wanda beams from the rocking chair, slowly gliding back and forth. Within minutes, Maria pushes the baby into the world.
“Tu eres muy fuerte y bonita mujer!” (You are a strong and beautiful woman!) Wanda kisses her forehead, not caring if her Spanish is wrong.
Wanda leaves Manuel in tears by Maria’s side. The sweet infant is lying in the warmer. The staff insists on having their way with the baby, as they have no further influence on the mother. Wanda speaks to the child in gentle tones. At the sound of her voice, the baby calms and becomes focused. The infant’s peace courses through her. Wanda knows it is for the baby that she was called here.
